DIARY NONSENSES

WEDNESDAY, 24th NOVEMBER, 2015 (23° C CLOUDY AND RAINY)

Hi everyone, sorry for being absent again in these few days, I've been enjoying the cold weather, yes cold weather it's been so pleasant from Saturday. Yesterday and today were very cold for a tropical zone like this. Maybe 22° C is not cold for most of the people but it's a relief in this part of Mexico, trust me and it's like a dream, like if I were living in a could place.

I've really thoughtful, I think I'm always like this but lately I've thinking about what I really like, I wonder if I chose to do what I really want and follow my likes no matter what everyone says would it be worth?, will I be happy and successful?

Well, I'd like to quit everything specially the intership thing, I still thing I'm doing them a favour by being there, that's why I don't feel guilty for skipping yesterday even thought that the dude in charge scolded us, I mean me and my partners.

TAKE ME AWAY!

Hi dear readers and future me I just wanted to say I'm here and I have a terrible headache so this is just a little update of my current day, today was just another crappy day in which I wish to be in another atmosphere, I hate studying here and the things that happen diary, like the heat I can't believe is Autumn, because the streets are so freaking hot and there is no trace of coldness,

I don't like saying this but I hate this place, for those who like Mexico don't come at least yo

u love extreme heat, otherwise look for other places, because you'll get a little of this desperation.

HOW IS IT LIKE TO BE ME AND BE CHRISTIAN

As I mentioned my dad had a purpose, to be pastor of a church and he became one 3 months ago, since then he's in charge of a small group of people.

But I bet most of my frequent readers must know how I am like and it might be weird for you to imagine we are a Christian family.

First because I wouldn't be a good follower, I'm not connected with God and it's a shame because I come here every Sunday and everything seems not to apply for me, since I  feel nothing, I don't talk to God and I feel my father is disappointed of me. Sometimes is like if were a guy from another country in a church and I don't speak the same language.

Second I've thought that once you say you're Christian to somebody is like feeling the same that most of the gay people feel when they come out, you feel like you're going to be hated, or people won't like you and they won't talk to you anymore. I am not ashamed or afraid of telling 'I'm' with God but it sorts feels like that.

Something I really like from the ideology of this church I go in specific, is that they say God doesn't force you to do anything, if you want to come you'll do it of you don't want to, don't do it and nobody is going to judge you, in contrary they'll do their best to help you.

And here God loves everyone but no matter if yesterday you did horrible things, you are welcome today, God loves gay people, racists, every sinner etc. He just hates sin.

 I don't feel I deserve all that tho.

BIG APOLOGIZE!!!! I'VE BEEN BUSY BUT I'VE PROCRASTINATED A BIT

SUNDAY, 15th NOVEMBER, 2015 (27° CLOUDY AND SUNNY, IF YOU ASK IT'S POSSIBLE:)

I know I've not written a while ago but there are things to say in this blog, firstly I'M SO SORRY! I've been really busy but I could have written at least an update paragraph to say hi I'm alive but I didn't, so in that case I'm sorry I'm alive and here to stay. Got it?

I'm not pretending to go away from blogger I have a big future ahead, I've got a lot of things I want to save in this blog and why not to share with the few readers I have. I don't know if I actually have readers or Google It's fooling me showing me between 6 and 20 people who read every post but I'll say I do have readers.

I don't know you but if you read this let me tell you thanks, even thought I created this blog just in order to save my thoughts, feelings and all those sentimental things for the future and laugh of me.
But I feel good some people have read what this guy has to say to the world.


THANKS AND KEEP READING THINGS!

WALKING DOWN THE LIFE

FRYDAY, 6th NOVEMBER, 2015 (27°)

Reporting my activities I'm sorry for been absent these... weeks I must say. I've been everywhere an nowhere, you know I've been forced to be in so many places I didn't want to be at but only my body was there because my mind has been being floating over a lot of places that aren't the places where I was. Far away, and even at home sleeping.

What can I do? it's the actual university, I have to do these things, even that I want to make explode everything.

I have so many ideas for the blog but I need to have time. 

I feel the desperation.

I'd like to quit life.

RAGE THOUGHTS

FRIDAY, 30th  OCTOBER,  (33°c BOILING IN AUTUMN!)

Everything is going crazy, It's like we are at the edge about to get insane, life is like very tensed these  days, I think that anyone could kill anybody in any moment.

The school, at home, at the church, the intership thing, the whole thing is like taking me down.




Pray for me I'm dying!

IT WAS BEAUTIFUL

Thursday 22nd October 2015, 06:54 AM

I'm sorry for being lazy, since I didn't have classes on Monday and Tuesday, at least I should have said hi!

The classes were cancel because of the weather, it was so stormy and amazing, I felt great it was actually raining properly, it was so rainy,  and I was like back in those long winter vacations in which everything was so deep, the feelings, the thoughts and the music.

I hope you understand a word I say because as this is so me that I tend to think that I'm the only one who feels this.

Like a year ago I wrote a blog about what a part of my mind is made of, what are my thoughts and that strange sensation that tortures me and at the same time it's the most beautiful thing I can feel and It really gets me, it's so deep so trust me I'd like to find someone who feels this nameless feeling.

Well it is pretty related to rainy days, since when the days are rainy I'm more likely to feel it.

By the way that blog in which I explain that it's in Spanish, I must translate it to English soon.

How do you enjoy rainy days?
Do you feel strange feelings mixed with thoughts, memories, sensations and visions?

DAYS ARE UGLY

As the days passed by I don't know if I becoming a bad guy or a better guy, my head it's so messed up and I don't know what to believe, everything is becoming so surreal, everything is subjective and relative.

I'm busy doing things I don't even care about.

I becoming that zombie, I don't know what to do, I want to rage quit everything.

In my life every aspect is becoming twisted.

PLAYING TRUANT (HACIENDO NOVILLOS/PELLAS)

TUESDAY, 13rd APRIL, 2015 10:02 AM ('BURNING' SUNNY)

Today, I played truant / hookey, yeah I didn't go to college I get up in the morning and said what if I don't go to school and then I found myself playing Smash Bros. At 7:30 in the morning, and quickly I planned to go for my check-pay from the days I worked on that cinema, so I am here in the mall next to the cinema, getting cold.

As it was 9:06 AM I thought it was too early to go to the cinema and I rode the bus till I thought I had consumed some time and then I took another bus to here but I still think is too early and I'm making use of the time I have to write this.

I was tired, exhausted and I didn't want to l go to school. So I'm a little nervous because of the way in which I left the job and now I have to come back, but I'll have money 💰.

Then I have to go and change the pay-check they'll give me and then I"ll go to but some points for Nintendo and maybe a sweater in the greatest mall in town. It's called Forum.

And then I'll get back home, when this be published I'll have already done all that, at least I'm counting on that. Nobody knows anything.

I'm nervous I don't want to go but it's money I'll be secure of myself. I gave a look and it looks close, I don't want to enter, 😖, help please.

Afterward: It was nothing, It was all right and I've got the money and I'll go for some jumpers some day.-

BECOMING KAWAI

I guest some things are happening over these days, I've been subdued to Japanese Animes, well today I decided to stop watching them but they're so freakin' addictive, you whatch one but then you discover another one and then you find yourself watching lots of them.

You know I'm not a freaky nor Otaku but I've learn some good stuff from them, you know things about life.

In some aspects it would be good for yourself to act like an Anime character.

They say way they have to say, what they want, they express their emotions no matter what, they say who they care about and get by the people they don't like. They do the necessary to achieve things.

And the stories are amusing.

I recommend you these, watch one just because.

¤Anohana
¤Charlotte
¤Angel beats
¤Aldnoah Zero
¤Owari No Seraph

DO YOU HATE COLDNESS? A KIND OF CHRONICLE

Whether walking or not you can feel it in your body, the tiring days.

It comes from everywhere, you cannot avoid it's invisible feeling, when moving around by those huge cans, the proximity to people will make you feel mad, they're boiling, I'm boiling.

When walking in the street you can see how everything absorbs the energy that makes you shout from inside, the water that runs down your face is your closest approach to the truly freshness but for sure that water is mostly sticky when it's gone.

Those vapours make you feel tired and angry, your face turns red and you only feel the desperation of that incandescent sensation in your skin and the vapour coming out from it.

Those cloudy days are jokes for those vaporous streets and burning bushes, the clouds covering the sky just hide that burning sensation in the skin but they intensify that suffocating sensation in the nose.

Bushes and grass burning, the streets are pans and cars are moving ovens, the hot air sets fire on peoples faces, no shade can be a relief, darkness is not cold anymore since it receives waves of heat.

Dogs shelter under shades, they can just dig deep to get some freshness, umbrellas are about to burn to ashes.

Home is just a hot jail, the atmosphere is awful, thirst is keeping us constantly moving and drinking.

Waiting, looking forward to see it cry, days go and days come to end, no relief can descent to quite us, days are longer when waiting, spring and summer don't leaves the sun.

Do you hate coldness? 

A TIRING LIFE

Well judging by the title you can tell I'm going to talk about what I'm going to live these days, months, year.

I swear this intership thing is killing me, It's awful, seriously I barely take care of myself, I just have time for school, then the intership and then homework.
This is not life I don't know how I've managed to do all those things up to now but I don't want to go.

Yesterday I was sleepy and I still had to do tiring things, I want to skip today the guy who I'm in charge on told me I was going to have too much work today. 😭

I wa to to go home after school, this is just a waste of time, my grades are just going to fall down😱.

Yes, my blog is going to die too.
And it's one year, one freaking year.

LAUGH!

I DON'T WANT TO BE A ZOMBIE/NEW PERSPECTIVES OF LIFE

Friday, 25th September, 2015 ( 29°C CLOUDY WITH SUNLIGHT) AUTUMN FINALLY

These days I've discovered several things about life, I used to see life from a different way but now I see life from different perspectives, well as a very young man I still life's hard and awful, if you are an average people you have to go through a  to gain some certain benefits.

You work and get paid, but how much you have to do just to work, just in order to have a good job you have to work so hard at school, mostly in college but just for you  to work more than you'll get paid, and I wonder if all those things are really worth, because I don't know if I'm going to able to do that, they take your youthfulness something that cannot be turned back, I'm being preparing to suffer out there, we are being prepare just to suffer. I really know most of the people choose what they like, just in order not to "work" but we work.

If you want a great life you have to deliver everything from you, we despoil ourselves of everything, at least here in my country most of the people work just for those politicians, we just gain a little percentage from everything we did, they just create new ways to obtain more money from the country, from the people, people who really worked hard and cried for help, because they need to eat, to give their children some food.

I'm really understandings mi parents position a little, It's awful to work hard, get tired and then just receive discounts and not a good amount  of money that eases your hardship.

We just keep feeding those fat politicians that are running out on money and ideas to obtain more money.

What's the finality, we'll all die, what do you need to do this, life doesn't make sense when living in a country where this happens, I  just want to effort and I want that effort to be worth, when I worked the pay was awful, terrible, I give much for my job I was tired, I hated it.

That's why nature is righteous, If  we worked for the nature, if we gave it everything from us to take care of it, to shape it and grow it, I know We would receive more, the trees give us fruits, the earth vegetables, the sky gives us the rain, the water, nobody would steal you, all the strength you lost, the relief you'll have when you see what you'll get.

I don't know what to do, I don't want to get infected by that virus that makes you not to give a f*ck about what are  doing to you, to your life, to your youthfulness. I don't want to turn into a zombie. Kill me before that happens.

Have a nice Autumn, if you hate it, please try to find the love within.

 

FINALLY!!!!!!

L'autunno è qua, è ora del'hype!

Autum is here, it's hype time!